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It's just not true. Source Comments (36) | Linking Sites | Permalink Previous Entries » Tom Cruise gives crazy birthday gifts » Russell Crowe has a short fuse » Tommy Lee keeps on going » Courtney Love is a "cool mom" » Scarlett Johansson gets her breasts squeezed Comments 1. Posted by SuperSpence on January 17, 2006 01:05 black PM Kate black Beckinsale is the hottest vampire since Catherine Deneuve had her breasts licked by Susan Sarandon. [Deneuve and Sarandon never made a living killing werewolves either, which just goes to prove that bi-curious bloodsuckers are useless when black you're about to get your ass handed to you by a 7-foot tall dog.] A former friend told me recently that "Underworld" wasn't a documentary, it's just a movie and that I shouldn't actually assume that Kate Beckinsale kills werewolves in sewers while posing in skintight black outfits. But since I happen to know "Underworld" IS a documentary and that Kate Beckinsale is so supremely hot for me and only me, I had to kill that former friend and eat his heart to gain his secret powers.
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