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Why are so many writers alcoholics? What's the deal with that? And, conversely, why would I soil my undies in elation if anyone ever kids asked me to write a book about Raymond Burr in a chair -- any kind of chair? It could be Raymond Burr in a beanbag chair for all I care! The day that happened there'd be one hell of a party at the Compound. It would be the crowning achievement of my life! And I guess I now kids need to reexamine what I consider sad... -- kids Toney told me an incredible story yesterday -- the kind of tale that makes life worth living. She was talking to her mother on the phone and found out that her brother's wife wants to have her stomach stapled. You know, that Carnie Wilson deal where they destroy one of your major organs because you can't keep your hand out of the goddamn Ho-Ho box? Well, this is apparently a dream she's had for a long time (hey, we can't all be John Lennons), and she finally took the plunge.
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