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I guess I passed out and teen plumper after that, because Rocky became convinced I was dying. Tim said he was screaming, "You're not dying on us, Jeff! Goddammit, and teen plumper you're not going to die!!" then attempted to begin CPR! Tim said he tried to pound on my chest, but missed and slugged me in the crotch. This brought me briefly back to consciousness, and I supposedly said, "Help me find my glasses Rocky, so I can kick your ass." It's one of my best lines, and I can't even remember saying it! After Tim got Rocky calmed down, they dumped me at Bill's house and went home. Bill took me into the den and just let me drop in a pile on the floor. He said he checked on me an hour or so later and there were two or three cats sleeping on my back. Shit, what a horrible night. Bill eventually called my girlfriend and she came and retrieved my sorry ass. She gave me shit, my parents gave me shit, and I felt pretty shitty on my own. And the next morning I found ten or twelve napkins stuffed in the pockets of my vomit-encrusted jeans with jokes scribbled all over them.
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