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So if some bears are into skinny guys, WITD, how come you've been made to feel unwelcome at bear venues? Because bear culture-a phrase I'm using under duress-has shown itself to be just brother sister in bed as susceptible to the body-image fascism that its earliest adherents claimed to be rebelling brother sister in bed against. brother sister in bed Bear culture quickly moved from rejecting the notion that there should be one standard of gay male beauty-hairless, flat-tummied twinks-to enforcing its own monolithic standard of gay male beauty-fat-bellied, hair-covered bears. At best, the bears who go out of their way to make you feel unwelcome are mildly hypocritical; at worst, they're so insecure that they feel threatened by your skinny, hairless presence. So what do you do? You go to bear bars anyway, WITD, and shrug off whatever grief you get. Then you remind yourself that until bear bars came along, the big hairy guys you like got tons of grief from the twink crowd that dominates most gay bars. |
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