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But the fact that my parents were still hurting each other made me feel sad. Therapy didn't make that go away. And because the conflict between my father and me was so intense, I still felt worthless and filthy. I continued to cut. Got High on Pain When I felt depressed, it was really hard southampton university to resist cutting. I substituted the physical pain for the emotional. As crazy as this sounds, I felt a little happier after I cut. I got high. Then usually I'd fall right to sleep. In the morning southampton university I'd wake southampton university up, and the burning feeling in my arm would make me remember why I had to cut. My erratic emotions would return. During counseling, I did stop cutting for a short while, but then my wrists began to itch. It was as if I had to do it, and I went back to cutting. In truth, I really didn't want to be helped. I wanted to be stuck where I was. I was too far gone into depression. I couldn't see past the next day.
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