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| health & fitness / women's health, ideas, student union, anne semans, whatyour mother never told you about sex, questions, nzherald, non monogamy, rugby, girl, drunkgirls sucking male strippers cocks, hardcore threesomes, author interviews, | In other words, it's a disaster! You must set clear limits. You don't need to be abusive, but you must make it clear that abuse gynecology will not be tolerated. gynecology This is also a very important example to set for your children. If you are loving and supportive when your spouse is abusive, it sets your children up to repeat the pattern as adults. Not a good idea! You can work out the best way to set limits with your counselor (alone if necessary). But please, please do not get trapped in the cycle of appeasement! Been there, done that too I have first-hand experience with a husband with NPD. We were in couple's counseling for 8 years and he was in an anger management group for 5 of those years. We have two beautiful children (now ages 1 and 5). I found personally that being with a narcissist was destroying me and I was exhausted most of the time. |
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| So maybe waiting awhile is a good idea . . . but not a long time. The thing is, your kids will model your behavior (in response to your husband) without understanding the reason for it - that you're compensating for an ill partner. That, combined with the NPD itself, gives them nothing healthy to imitate. To the extent possible, you need to give them a healthy emotional model, something positive enough and consistent girl enough to counter the pervasive influence of the NPD. That will give them girl a base from which to understand that their dad isn't entirely girl well, that his perspective isn't the only valid world view, and that his behaviour isn't necessarily the way that they should behave themselves. Good luck! anon I have a sibling with NPD, and I can tell you that ''feeding their needs'' or trying to ''appease'' them to maintain the peace has the same long term effect that Chamberlain's attempt to appease Hitler had. |
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