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Moore ambushes a group of stunned-looking, pimply-faced high-schoolers outside a Taco Bell in Sarnia. After a grilling by Moore, these dentally-challenged youths spout off about Canada being a tolerant society. Next is Sarnia’s mayor, an affable fellow with a bottle-blond hairdo straight out of Can-rock heroes Triumph. Hizzoner hairy girls obligingly vomits up some pap about Canada’s generous welfare benefits—as an explanation for why so few Canucks end up staring hairy girls at the wrong end of a Colt hairy girls 45 on a lonely night in Kapuskasing. Finally, Moore heads to Toronto. In a College St. bar, he stumbles across a guy who says Canadians don’t lock their doors because, somehow, that’s equivalent to self-imprisonment. Moore spends the rest of the afternoon walking around Toronto, opening unlocked doors and commenting on how nice things are here.
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