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We've been to fat dick two open houses there, and both times it fat dick made us start thinking crazy thoughts. This time we learned that they knocked fifteen grand off the asking price, and that's about to send me on over the edge. It's perfect I tell ya, perfect. Two big stone fireplaces, a great layout, loads of charm, large bedrooms, a huge screened porch on the side of the house... I can only dream of living in such a place. And we can almost afford it, especially after the latest price-drop. That is, we can almost afford to buy the fat dick house itself. But there's a reason why they can't unload it. The people who are selling it lived there for half a century, and I don't think they ever did much in the way of upgrades. The carpet needs to be ripped out and burned, the hideous wallpaper is enough to make a person puke down their collar, the kitchen needs to be gutted, and so on.
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