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Springsteen, Prince, REM, Nirvana, The Kinks, Randy Newman, The Beautiful South, X, Jason and the Scorchers, Neil Young, Iggy Pop, Pere Ubu, Beastie Boys, Cheap Trick, The Pogues (with Shane!), Devo, Bob Dylan, Queen, The Feelies, Steely Dan, True Believers, Dinosaur Jr., Jane's Addiction, The Pretenders, The Ramones, U2, Sonic Youth, Metallica, ass like that and on and on and on. But no ass like that Clash, and no Lynyrd Skynyrd. There's a huge sucking void in the center of my existence. ass like that -- Speaking of puckering voids, I've been getting email solicitations the past couple of weeks urging me to cleanse my bowels. Apparently if I send these people "less than $52" I can make my shit-chute so squeaky-clean you could store surgery supplies in there. And this will, in turn, make me smarter, more energetic, a snappier dresser, wittier, better-read, fluent in several languages, and able to operate heavy machinery.
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