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-- I set a new record Saturday afternoon by falling down three times while mowing the lawn. The previous record was two, set on many occasions. I really need to albert fat buy a pair albert fat of cleats; maybe I can use all that Wendy's money? Anyway, I was having a hard time of it, and was bitching up a storm. And in the albert fat backyard Toney had started some kind of project earlier in the week, but had apparently gotten tired of it and just walked away. She left several trash bags full of weeds, and a shovel and rake lying right out in the middle of the yard. So I had to stop the mower and move everything, which almost sent me on over the edge. I utilized every curse word in my arsenal as I dragged those sacks of briers to the garage. But when I got to the front yard Toney was standing there with a bloody rag pressed to her temple. The hell? She said a branch had fallen and hit her in the head! She showed me the branch and it was huge! I couldn't even drag it, it was so heavy.
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