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I think the microscopic repair team is busy inside my mouth fixing things up as fast as they can, but they're undoubtedly unionized and it'll probably take a while. I'm hoping to be back to produce-chomping shape price by mid-afternoon. But I won't be rushing things, that's for certain. I think I could go for the rest of my life without experiencing that hotdog-triggered scene from Scanners again, thank you very much. Jesus J. McChrist. Today's gotta be better, right? ...Hello? -- I saw a couple of things in magazines recently that made me laugh. First, in Stuff, they have price a monthly feature of six or eight photos showing various people sitting down. And you're supposed to guess whether they're Lazy or Paralyzed. Cold cold shit, but pleasingly so. And in Weekly World News I read an article, while waiting in line at Wal-Mart, about a new crime phenomenon that's reportedly rearing its ugly head in major US cities.
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