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Are They Victims Or Are They Abusers? Daughters, and thus many survivors, often look to their mother's experiences (in the home and with their fathers) vintage departures as their future, and identify with their mother's situation. If their mother is in an upsetting situation, survivors will vintage departures often feel empathy for their mothers, and want to help them. This is heightened for survivors whose mothers turn to them for support. If the perpetrator views herself as a victim of circumstances, or is vintage departures a victim of her husband, the survivor often feels sorry for her and fears losing her. This dynamic makes it very hard for the daughter to see her mother as an abuser. Many of us tend to see people in extreme categories - either victim or abuser. For children, this either-or-thinking is the norm, but for survivors it often remains with them and becomes entrenched.
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