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Entering into a relationship with someone who is HIV-positive -- when you are negative -- kind of puts a damper on that. It's hard to plan. You know that eventually something ray pride is going to change. That's the negative side. On the good side of this relationship? I smell flowers with him. I see things that I've never seen. I take the time to see the beauty in ray pride people and the beauty in things. I take the time, even in snowstorms. We held hands and walked down Berkeley Street recently, tasting the snow as it was coming down. When ray pride I was drinking, I would be bitching, "Oh, this goddamn slush." It was really beautiful. I see a lot of things through him. On the blue days, I see blue real blue. The disease isn't there 80 percent of the time. It's there when it has to be. And when it comes up unexpectedly, it's not as big a deal.
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