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| health sexuality & pregnancy, mothersand daughters / personal narratives, sex search, motherhood, how is video on demand done, homemade dildo., paperbacks, science & nature anatomy & physiology, plannedparenthood federation of america, flora weisel, vagina, animal sex xxx, hollywood, chicago newspaper, socal, 0399528539, essay, | I can't remember my father's voice saying those words to exclusive my mother, but I know he did. Love her, that is, even if he did forget her birthday later. Once, he did remember, and he hurt her feelings by buying her one pair of flimsy ladies underwear from the Dollar Store uptown and she wailed that nobody loved her, then threw the underwear exclusive in the garbage can beneath our pecan tree. But exclusive you can tell he loved her by looking at this photograph, the way his arm circles her, the way he holds her hand. She lets herself be contained, lets him whisper in her ear. This time the camera is peeping; Mama seems almost embarrassed at being watched; her eyes glance toward the ground. |
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| Open. She's wearing short shorts and she's conscious: "This is how I want to be remembered; I am as marvelous as Miss America." She gives herself to the camera, maybe to the eyes behind the camera. I imagine paperbacks my father before he was my father, smiling at my mother before she was my mother. He has a head full of glossy black hair. Squinting his eyes, bringing her into focus, he snaps this photo of her, thinks of butterflies resting on leaves, camouflaged, right paperbacks before they are netted, pinned into boxes. In paperbacks the next photo, she and my father are leaning against an enormous pine tree near the banks of the Apalachicola River, right on the Georgia-Florida line. He's wearing shoes, thick brown brogans. She isn't. Her long slender feet are posed calendar-girl style. Daddy surrounds her with a bearlike grasp, his arm draped over her shoulder, his big hand pulling her to him. He smooches her ear with his mouth, whispering, "Baby, I love you, I love you so much." |
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