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I did what I knew would hurt her most. And yet supermodels I missed her, missed the magical everythingness between us. I wanted to replicate it, and I did. The ketchup incident, part two I went out supermodels to eat with my mom shortly before her cancer diagnosis. She owed me money and didn't want to pay it back — because she had paid my $175 dentist bill some years before, because no one had ever done anything for her, because I should want to give her money. The thing was, I might have given her the money, but supermodels she told me she would pay me back, and I get insane about people doing exactly what they say they'll do. I always thought that was what set me off that day, causing the only prolonged visual and auditory hallucination I've ever experienced not on drugs. Now I see it was a flashback to the knife-in-the-ketchup-bottle scene from fifteen years earlier.
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