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It's obvious that the Earth has now slipped out of orbit and is hurtling toward the sun. You'd think CNN and Fox would be all over something like this, our planet being absorbed into a giant ball of fire? Yeah, well, apparently not. They're all talking about the Pledge of Allegiance this morning, ignoring the fact that we're all now living on a George Foreman grill. (Can you feel the slant? fat lady Me too!) It's gonna be really hard to hold our hands over fat lady our hearts once we hit the big Frydaddy in the sky, and become a giant fat lady basket of hushpuppies. Ya know? Crap! I think my scrotum just burst into flames... -- Even before I became convinced the end is near, I'd given up on buying a new car. Apparently nobody is going to agree to sell me a $25,000 SUV for nothing down, three hundred a month, so screw 'em.
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