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"Your party is meeting in the lounge," said the hostess when I arrived, and everyone was already talking at inappropriate volume levels when I walked in. Apparently this trans fat was going to be an evening of debauchery, not some stuffy formal affair. Cool. Debauchery is one of my personal trans fat fields of expertise. One of the people there was a guy who made several snide, sarcastic remarks to me the last time I attended one of these functions. He'd kept asking me if I liked to hunt and attend tractor pulls, and shit like that. I'd forgotten trans fat all about it, until I saw his face again. And we weren't seated for more than five minutes before he started it up again. "So Jeff, do you do a lot of deer hunting?" I mean, what the fuck?! What's with this guy, and the deer hunting?? It's not like I was wearing a straw hat and cradling a ceramic jug of 'shine in the crook of my arm. Being from West Virginia is sometimes a big cross to bear... Later, one of the other people didn't know what a portobello mushroom was and this guy blurted out, "I feel like I'm having dinner with a bunch of mountain men!"
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