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| ejaculations, cafe, feminism, book reviews, crossdresser, transsexual, possible, jenna movies, publisher, committees, personal memoirs, modern romance, noir, allabout my mother, susanna, clubs, | I wish I had screamed that I was grrls a transsexual. I still kept what I knew myself to be to myself. I didn't want to hurt my mother any more than I had. The grrls therapist I don't believe was fooled but I believe he felt my wearing girls clothing was a fetish thing since the only other experience he had with the situation was a member of a rock band who wanted to wear a woman's blouse when he performed. This wasn't anywhere grrls close to my situation and I believe it was part of what caused me not to tell the therapist my deepest darkest secret. After a year or two of this type of behavior I decided that this wasn't going to make the slightest difference and just stopped. I lied only when the lie was a white one. |
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| My voice changing was sickening to me. Loosing the sweet girlish sounding voice I had as committees a child sent me into deep despair. This all made me angry with myself, committees with my friends, with my family, and with humanity in general. This led to me doing the things teenagers do to rebel. I committees lied, shoplifted and broke into houses not to steal but simply to snoop around. The things I did were a cry for attention. And attention I received in spades. I got caught at both but instead of being charged with the crimes I was sent to counseling. During this time frame my parents caught me with a slip on under my shirt and pants. When this came up at counseling I wish to god I had told the therapist the truth. |
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