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| college, hidden camera voyeur, health & fitness / women's health, arts, bulls, bikini babes, uk, father daughter incest, bookseller, amateur voyeur, sex (biology), a, illinois, | I've had a bottle of wine at dinner with a friend and had a rich encounter and didn't feel it was not sober. I've had food I'm selected not supposed to eat and it felt okay. I've had anonymous sex with people and felt okay about it. A dignity of self that I never had before is being restored to me. I can have my cake and eat it too. The 12-step work allows me to see that I can manage my life if selected I do selected certain things. My goal is to be in conscious contact with a higher power, even though that higher power may be inside me. It's almost as if in my head there's one identity and self-image, and in my heart there's a different one. When there is more of a balance of heart and mind, that's the truer me. The HIV-Negative Support Group that meets once a month in Boston has been remarkable. |
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| I believe their fear for themselves is behind that. A lesbian friend of mine, on the other hand, has compassionately bookseller voiced concern. I don't read it as disapproval. I read bookseller it as her saying, "Take precautions as much as you can." * * * Twelve-step work has been crucial to my process. The 12-step work includes Survivors of Incest Anonymous, Adult Children of Alcoholics, Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, Overeaters Anonymous, and once in a while, Co-Dependents Anonymous. I probably am an alcoholic, but I don't go to Alcoholics Anonymous. Alcohol bookseller is not my substance of choice, but if there was a bottle of wine here, I'd probably finish it off. If there was a birthday cake, I'd eat the whole thing. I could abuse almost anything. The issue is not the cake. It's not the wine. The issue is self-hatred. If I can soften my judgment of myself, then I'm better off. |
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