So maybe waiting awhile sun times sexand the septuagenarians

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So maybe waiting awhile is a good idea . . . but not a long time. The thing is, your kids will sexand the septuagenarians model your behavior (in response to your husband) sexand the septuagenarians without understanding sexand the septuagenarians the reason for it - that you're compensating for an ill partner. That, combined with the NPD itself, gives them nothing healthy to imitate. To the extent possible, you need to give them a healthy emotional model, something positive enough and consistent enough to counter the pervasive influence of the NPD. That will give them a base from which to understand that their dad isn't entirely well, that his perspective isn't the only valid world view, and that his behaviour isn't necessarily the way that they should behave themselves.
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